WHEAT FROM CHAFF

Isaiah 19:1-21:17; Galatians 2:1-16; Psalm 59:1-17; Proverbs 23:13-14

“When the people cry to the Lord for help against those who oppress them, he will send them a savior who will rescue them.”

But when Peter came to Antioch, I had to oppose him to his face, for what he did was very wrong. When he first arrived, he ate with the Gentile Christians, who were not circumcised. But afterward, when some friends of James came, Peter wouldn’t eat with the Gentiles anymore. He was afraid of criticism from these people who insisted on the necessity of circumcision. As a result, other Jewish Christians followed Peter’s hypocrisy, and even Barnabas was led astray by their hypocrisy. …We know that a person is made right with God by faith in Jesus Christ, not by obeying the law. And we have believed in Christ Jesus, so that we might be made right with God because of our faith in Christ, not because we have obeyed the law. For no one will ever be made right with God by obeying the law.”

But as for me, I will sing about your power. Each morning I will sing with joy about your unfailing love. For you have been my refuge, a place of safety when I am in distress. O my Strength, to you I sing praises, for you, O God, are my refuge, the God who shows me unfailing love.

Don’t fail to discipline your children. They won’t die if you spank them. Physical discipline may well save them from death. Commit yourself to instruction; listen carefully to words of knowledge.”

We all spend a lot of time – for most of us, too much time -- thinking about what others think of us, and working hard to see that what they think is good. We also focus a lot on how others make us feel, and on forming judgments of their efforts and opinions. This is only natural. Given that we were created to live in community, it would be irrational for us not to give some consideration to helping others live in that same community. It would be selfish to disregard how we affect others. Nevertheless, we need to establish some boundaries. We need to set limits on the ways others’ thoughts and evaluations of our lives are going to impact us, and on how we will respond to their praise as well as their criticism. We also need to be careful that the medicine we offer others is not worse than the disease we think they have contracted.

Most everyone criticizes and gets criticized by friends as well as enemies at some point. This is not bad of itself; the definition of criticism, contrary to what most of us think, allows for both positive and negative reviews. Problems arise when such critiques are not accurate or true or considerate. Said another way, the problem with judgment arises when it becomes more about us than the other person, and that applies whether we are on the giving or receiving end of it. We all presume to understand others’ feelings when we cannot possibly be certain. Criticism is not always altruistic. People sometimes make honest, albeit well-meaning, mistakes, too. The upshot of all this, then, is that proper discernment is needed, whether we are offering or getting criticism. We should never be so defensive that we cannot hear the wisdom amid the noise. But we also need the ability to separate inspired instruction from all-too-fallible human advice or emotion.

There is another reason perspective is a key element in our ability to grow and help others grow into the people God created us to be. “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” Proverbs reminds us that we are here to help each other. None of us has the objectivity to see ourselves as we are all the time. We need friends with the courage to call spades spades when we lose our way. Nowhere is this demonstrated in Scripture any more clearly than in today’s passage from Galatians. I wonder how the Jerusalem Jews responded to Paul’s little sermon. I can only imagine how Peter felt. Humiliated, angry, pridefully defensive… I bet there was not a “Christian” thought in the house when Paul got through. But that did not make him wrong. Peter needed strong medicine, and it is good Paul was willing to step up and administer it.

On the other hand, judgment for the sake of establishing moral superiority does nothing but demean the one being judged and destroy the sense of community the Spirit intends us to build. I have been on the receiving end of self-determined “righteous” judgment more than once, and the only effect I have ever seen it have is greater alienation. People do not change in response to being told by others that they are better or their way is the only proper path. People change in response to loving advice that seeks to build them up and make them stronger. If our purpose is to tear down and humble instead of support and nurture, we should just keep our thoughts to ourselves. Sometimes, the difference between building up and tearing down can be pretty tough to hear. All renovation requires some destruction, after all. But the end goal makes all the difference, and we must understand and appreciate it before we start getting critical or criticized.

Two issues remain. First, we must assure our own sensitivity to the Spirit whenever we start thinking of offering our opinions to others about their thoughts and actions. We need to know our critiques are just, and not just “honest” ventings of our own feelings which do little to improve anyone else’s life. When we dare to chide, it is important not to overstate our case, and we need to use words that can be heard.

Next, we need to not take criticism so seriously that the Holy Spirit cannot use or discard it as appropriate. This is a particularly tough issue for me. Because I tend to believe the worst about myself in any event, I take to heart virtually any criticism, no matter how small, and then I worry over it until it sometimes becomes more important than the thing it was aimed at in the first place. My feelings of inadequacy become more about the criticism than even the thing being criticized. I sincerely hope others spare themselves this futile scab-picking. But on the off chance I am not the only one who does this, let me offer my own criticism. Stop it! Anxiety over criticism is the most counter-productive response there is. Hear it, and fix it or don’t, but do not continue to pour over it and worry about it. Satan does not need another foothold. Once we separate the wheat from the chaff, we can either have a feast or a bonfire. But let’s not waste a lot more time worrying about which is which. Deal with what needs to be addressed, and leave the rest behind.