THE LORD OF DISCIPLINE

Deuteronomy 7:1-8:20; Luke 7:36-8:3; Psalm 69:1-18; Proverbs 12:1

“Think about it: Just as a parent disciplines a child, the Lord your God disciplines you for your own good.”

“O God, you know how foolish I am;
my sins cannot be hidden from you.
Don’t let those who trust in you be ashamed because of me,
O Sovereign Lord of Heaven’s Armies.
Don’t let me cause them to be humiliated,
O God of Israel.”

 “To learn, you must love discipline;
it is stupid to hate correction.”

Discipline, when done in love, almost always looks different to the one giving the discipline than the one receiving it. My Dad set very high standards. Weekends were either spent on the ball field or working in the yard. Weeknights were all about studying: grades were non-negotiable; there was never any excuse for less than a four point (though I still fell short on several memorable occasions). Extracurricular activities, sports and awards weren’t optional, either - they were expected, as was participation in various church and social events. Idle time was a true luxury. Dad had his list, and was willing to do whatever it took to make a man out of me. I wasn’t sure I ever wanted to be his kind of man. Please don’t misunderstand; I was always treated well. Dad was just a little relentless in instilling in me a discipline, a mental toughness, I never would have developed on my own.

The real problem was it did not feel like love at the time.  It confused me. Was this how a father was supposed to love? It felt cold, hard, and I made it worse by fighting the process instead of learning from it. Dad was not afraid to shave a few rough edges off to mold me into who he thought I needed to be, and I did not always handle the pruning well. I wondered if he knew how to love. But then, years later, I lost my job. He gave me one piece of advice; just one. “At least ten resumes a day, Tom. Get ‘em out. That’s your job now. This is not the time for a vacation.” I’m not sure I could quote another thing Dad ever said to me in my fifty-one years of life, but I remember that. And I remember what discipline it took to follow that advice. Discipline I would never have had, especially while battling feelings of betrayal and depression, but for the discipline Dad instilled in me as I was growing up. Suddenly, love developed a whole different dimension. I realized how very blessed I was to have a man who pushed me as a father so I could withstand the storms of life as an adult. I may not have appreciated him, but I nevertheless needed a man big enough to handle my disobedience, and unafraid to share his unique brand of tough love with his son.

The writer of Proverbs got it right: it is stupid to hate correction. Discipline – at least, when not accompanied by judgment – is a gift, a blessing.  Not a day goes by now that I don’t give thanks for my father’s gift, even that which felt like bad medicine at the time. And I’m learning to appreciate my heavenly Father’s discipline more, too. God disciplines because He loves. No father that does not discipline his kids can truly claim to love them. All of us need protection from ourselves, and training on how to avoid bad decisions and their consequences. God, like Dad, sometimes needs to step in and encourage a change in course. Going with Him is the smart thing to do. I’m beginning to understand both Dad and Abba know more than I do about a lot of things. If I try to listen more and resist less, I may just learn a thing or two. Like how much I am loved.