SENSITIVITY TRAINING

1 Samuel 24:1-25:44; John 10:22-42; Psalm 116:1-19; Proverbs 15:20-21

“’Who is this fellow David?’ Nabal sneered to the young men. ‘Who does this son of Jesse think he is? There are lots of servants these days who run away from their masters. Should I take my bread and my water and my meat that I’ve slaughtered for my shearers and give it to a band of outlaws who come from who knows where?’ So David’s young men returned and told him what Nabal had said. ‘Get your swords!’ was David’s reply as he strapped on his own.”

“Don’t believe me unless I carry out my Father’s work. But if I do his work, believe in the evidence of the miraculous works I have done, even if you don’t believe me. Then you will know and understand that the Father is in me, and I am in the Father.”

“Let my soul be at rest again, for the Lord has been good to me. He has saved me from death, my eyes from tears, my feet from stumbling. And so I walk in the Lord’s presence as I live here on earth!”

 I sympathize with Nabal; unfortunately, I really do. Yes, I have a wonderfully pragmatic wife who acts as my intermediary and has saved my bacon more times than I will ever know. But that’s not why I so identify with the man whose very name means “fool.” There are times my independence and manly pride run away with my common sense, but that does not fully explain my empathy with Nabal, either. What does is that I don’t think before I speak nearly enough, and even when I do, it’s seldom about the outlook or feelings of the folks I’m talking to. As a result, like Nabal, I’m usually living on tin ice, and many times, like him, I’m not even smart enough to realize it.

As but one of many possible illustrations, when I direct plays, I use a lot of imagery to try to give the actors better ideas of what a scene requires. One evening rehearsal, an actor suddenly got a very strange look on her face totally out of place with the other actors and mood of the scene. I wasn’t sure if she even knew she was doing it (which should have been my first clue to work on my subtlety outside the hearing of the rest of the cast), and I am ashamed to admit that, to this day, I still don’t know what motivated it. All I knew was it ruined the scene and had to be fixed right then. So I spoke earnestly, using the best image I could come up with on short notice: “Jane, you look like you just put your hand in a bag of fleas!” Sometimes, even I don’t know where I get this stuff, but regardless, it was the wrong place and time to say it. “Jane” went on a week long bender and nearly quit the show, which would have been a complete disaster.  It cost me several private and public apologies, a lot of credibility and a lunch to put things back together, all because of one thoughtless sentence.

Scripture suggests Nabal was stupid, and one certainly could argue, with Forest Gump’s Mama, that stupid is as stupid does. But that is too simple an analysis of this story. It shrouds a deeper, more important, truth. In fact, Nabal was no one’s village idiot. He was a very successful rancher and merchant with a beautiful, brilliant and sensitive wife.  His problem was not the ability to think; his problem was his thoughtlessness. Along with his blind, self-centered, arrogant macho, a little lack of consideration of others was all it took to bring the man down. No doubt Abigail had been pulling his fat out of the fire for years. Nothing else can really explain her quick and perfect response. But there comes a time, if we do not repent of such sins as arrogance and thoughtlessness, when we will do ourselves in despite all the best efforts of those who love us in spite of ourselves.

Jesus Christ is happy to offer all who come to Him much-needed sensitivity training. We need to be able to communicate effectively, but a large part of that is communicating in a way which can actually be heard, understood and appreciated by those we seek to influence. In short, we do a lot better when we are intentional about letting the Spirit speak through us – as Jesus promised – rather than being so intent on simply getting our own points across.