BETTER THAN WE DESERVE

Ezekiel 16:42-17:24; Hebrews 8:1-13; Psalm 106:13-31; Proverbs 27:7-9

“Now this is what the Sovereign Lord says: ‘I will give you what you deserve, for you have taken your solemn vows lightly by breaking your covenant. Yet I will remember the covenant I made with you when you were young, and I will establish an everlasting covenant with you. Then you will remember with shame all the evil you have done. … And I will reaffirm my covenant with you, and you will know that I am the Lord. You will remember your sins and cover your mouth in silent shame when I forgive you of all that you have done. I, the Sovereign Lord, have spoken!’”

“’But this is the new covenant I will make with the people of Israel on that day,’ says the Lord: ‘I will put my laws in their minds, and I will write them on their hearts. I will be their God, and they will be my people. And they will not need to teach their neighbors, nor will they need to teach their relatives, saying, “You should know the Lord.” For everyone, from the least to the greatest, will know me already. And I will forgive their wickedness, and I will never again remember their sins.’”

“The people refused to enter the pleasant land, for they wouldn’t believe his promise to care for them. Instead, they grumbled in their tents and refused to obey the Lord.”

“A person who strays from home is like a bird that strays from its nest. The heartfelt counsel of a friend is as sweet as perfume and incense.”

If the Lord truly gave us exactly what we deserve, we’d all be in a lot of trouble. Thankfully, He does not give us what we deserve; He gives us Himself as a perfect sacrifice in the Person of Jesus Christ. He gives us direction and purpose and wise counsel through the Holy Spirit. As Creator, he has given us life itself. But still, many of us hold back from claiming and fully experiencing all the Lord’s blessings. Knowing we are not worthy, we are too timid to approach the Throne of glory. Or, we decide we can handle things on our own and just don’t need Him. Either way, we convey the greatest insult of all to our Father: we reject His gifts and His grace.

Make no mistake: it is an insult when we reject the gifts of God, whether our rejection is based on unworthiness and timidity or whether it is based on our own arrogance and lack of perceived need. It all comes to the same end. We refuse to take hold of the hand that would save us, and we thereby condemn ourselves. We affirmatively choose not to allow the Lord to have any say in our lives and no control over our destinies. He will certainly honor our decision, but that does not mean we don’t hurt Him in the process. The Lord really cares about our decisions, and when they do not include Him, it saddens Him.

I don’t pretend to know exactly how the Father feels when He is rejected by His children, but I do know how I feel. I recall specifically how it felt last Fall. Readers already know about our Spring Break ski trip and the wonderful time I had with my two sons. However, half the fun was definitely not in getting there. I remember clearly discussing the possibility of a ski trip with one of my sons in October, only to be met with fairly staunch rejection. I am too slow, don’t ski black diamonds and could not keep up. It would not be any fun for him, I was told, to be skiing alone. I think, maybe, he had thoughts of putting a trip together with his college buddies – which would have been fine – but that’s not how it came out. What I heard was, “You’re too old. You’re not cool. I don’t want to be with you, even if you’re paying.” I’ll admit this was not totally unexpected – there comes a time for each of us as parents, I suppose. I know I’m not cool, and I’m clearly getting older by the day. But even knowing that did not make the rejection any easier to bear. I started out wounded and then, in a decidedly un-Christlike way, I just got mad. That would have been the end, probably, of our annual ski trips. Except for my wife, whose wisdom and perspective I have come to cherish. Her question was direct and to the point: “Who’s supposed to be the adult here? Who is supposed to model Christ?”

I still found it surprisingly difficult to forgive the rejection. Wounded pride never heals as quickly as we’d like. My son and I found very little to talk about that winter. But one day, he asked whether I’d made the ski reservations for us yet. The first time, I put him off. I did not want a mercy trip, and I guess I needed to test his sincerity. After the third time, it became clear he was serious about wanting to go with me (probably, because the trip with friends did not pan out, but I found I did not care why). When he asked the fourth time, just like that, I found I’d forgiven him, and we had a great time.

Truth be told, we both ended up getting better than we deserved, and I now understand things better. Even though my son mainly wanted something from me, once he realized he had to accept me to get it and was willing to do so, I was only too happy to provide more than he’d asked for (literally, his first lobster tail and butter dinner during our trip, for example). He accepted me; it became my joy to give; and I soon forgave and forgot the personal insult.

I do not claim to be any great model of spirituality or right living, but this experience did help me understand my Creator a bit better. It provided much greater insight into just how much the Lord longs to be with us, and how it hurts Him to be rejected. But recognizing that, it also allowed me to see more clearly the depth of His love and forgiveness. We reject His gifts more often than we know. We flatly reject Him as well. Nevertheless, as soon as we are willing to let Him into our lives, even for a little bit, He is ready and waiting to forgive and bless us, in spite of the pain we’ve caused. I don’t understand the depth or breadth of such a love. I don’t know why God still insists on giving us all better than we deserve. But I do know He does so, and I know I don’t really have to fully understand the hows or whys. I just have to accept Him as He is.